I was that person that always laughed at people and talked shit about cause they were “sprung” over a women. When in reality they was in love with a women. I was always that person outside the inner box of having a love life for I havnt experience that deep inner emotion. I never been in love with two people at once Iam skeptical of that or even if its possible and just a feeling of how people seems to think what it is or dont love the other at all just dont realize it. With that said I have never been in a situation like that dosent mean it cant happen.
Let me rewind back for I went off track with two different topics that are different thoughts in my mind. Like I said I always thought love to be something in books that we read or hopeless romantics wanting to desperately want to have as if heroin to a addicted. Kinda like wishful thinking. But I have experience it late in life and it has taken my life by my neck as if hanging from a tree waiting to die of it but still living. It can be very strong as well over powering and cause so much pain.
That even when the one you love gets with another your still there for them cause you love them that much rather you think you end up back with them or not. You deal with the pain that you lost them and know its over but always reminded when you hear their voice or see their face how much you love them. That even tho you are at a great lost you dont know how to let go and stop the love from growing everyday. That you find your self stuck in a time of “what was” instead of “what is”.
I am no longer laughing for its not a laughing matter. I am a believer. I make no jokes. For I love someone very much even tho they are not with me.
Blog by Jesse Ayon